sama si M! :)

love you girls! it's only now that i got to check my blog. hehehe.

when are you girls free? L and M, have you guys started working already?

who's free this weekend?

ayos noh, ginawang message board ang blog. hahahah.

hugs to everyone!!! :)

oh, my poor fragile heart!

i promise to take good care of you this year. i'm letting you rest and recuperate for a while. who needs anyone, anyway.

on a cheerful note, last night was fucking fun, E and A! let's do that again and bring S and L! love you guys :)

solace

the weather is cold again. i don't know if i like this changing weather, which marks the start of the coming holiday season that would surely bring back some unwanted memories. sometimes i seem to live and think in contradictory thoughts. one day i say i miss being in a relationship but a few days after, i think about how futile it is to crave for intimacy, that i am better off alone - not committed to anyone in particular. apparently, life still never fails to amaze me. i could never have imagined that you could blink one day and all of the things you got used to seeing every day would just be gone. but that's just what happened. i woke up one day and noticed how things were starting to feel different until time came that i felt like fuck it, this just got to end.

i've been doing some thinking recently and i started to get the feeling that i ought to write a little more. so here i am in my desk, creeping around in the middle of the night like a cockroach, trying to to do some sensible (i hope!) writing. i'm back home, oh-so-enjoying the very chill atmosphere of a long weekend - no traffic, no dramedy called Work, no e-mails, no clients berating about their wealth and no waking at 6am (oh geezus, thank you for that). i've had 2 good days already, which were comprised mostly of sleeping, eating, wondering, wandering, some good ole laughing and mingling (never fails!). i am beyond thankful to have this short break because it reminds me of the many people i care about. time has flown fucking fast and things may have screwed up at the start but i am trying to function as best as i can. i do need some solitary times to do some straightening out with myself.

lately, i sometimes feel like i have turned into a perpetually emo-sawi person, faking each laughter and hyper moment i spend with friends (okay, not really. heheh). i've also been getting really, really tired that i get a bit partied out after just one dance-bar night-out. when things get really bad, i'd spend the whole working day wrapped up in a cloud of delusion. sometimes it gets in the way of work that my colleagues often give me strange looks. ha ha sorry folks, i just can't help it, i don't do it on purpose. but i am generally fine - had a dearth of things to say that i couldn't choose which bits to write about here -hence the dormant blog for a month. in between last month's fuckingevent and its corresponding aftermath, i am able to drown myself from work as usual. it's just difficult to make my mind tick again when i'm out and about with crazy people and my mind is nothing but going bonkers on weng weng. other than that, i could still read and write (thank god).

i see there was no attempt to be sensible at all. ha ha.

***********
E! please, please let's travel this year. just on a whim like for a long weekend. i'll try to get a bargain trip for us. advance happy birthday, darling! :-)

hi L (hugs!) and Melibags! (sure, sama ka sa inuman. i miss you, hugs back!)

have tons of kwento, can't wait to see you all soon!

oh love, love, love

i'm not quite sure how to react to this poem. somehow it feels so overwhelming and a bit defensive. but i like how it's so practical and real against other mostly hopeless love-inspired poetry.

If You Forget Me by Pablo Neruda
I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

after a year...

i miss you.

still.

good riddance!

i have never been this better and happy and fulfilled in such a long, long time! friends, feel free to give me call if you guys feel the need of going for a round of drinks. watchasay? YES? of course!!!!!!!!!


i love surprises! what a way to start the new month. woot! :)

highness and over-abundance of energy

i just got back from my very short weekend vacay at where else but hometown Naga. sure nothing beats home but overindulgence is still overindulgence no matter how many times i try to justify the lechones and endless slothing i have done for the past 2 days. argh! enough is enough! today i am confronted by piles and piles of work to be finished not to mention exams i need to take seriously. boy payback time scares the hell out of me. anyway, just to showcase the latest brouhaha in my life, i'm posting a picture of my favorite and cutest nephew in the world. i know my other nephews are equally cute but personality-wise, gabe is the winner!

don't grow up, please? (see pictures at my multiply)


i digress. have you seen the VMA's? my god can someone explain to me what happened to Sarah Silverman? talk about career-crisis, girl! don't even get me started on britney what spears.

all in all, fun weekend! good food + good company = good life! Yay! all i need is a good massage and a hearty meal. I'm ready to take off! :)